You Are A Puzzle Piece: Your Value In Relationships
May 01, 2013 relationshipsAll the context you need: I had a pal tell me this:
"She would rather be alone than with me. That means I'm worse than being alone."
Aside from the built-in prejudice that being alone is automatically the same as "bad", there's a much worse fallacy at play.
Dan Savage frequently says there isn't a "The One", but there's a lot of 0.7's, or 0.8's. Maybe even some 0.9's. Even that is problematic, because you have to remember that each person's scale only counts for that person.
As I put it to my pal:
Your relationship doesn't work out? That sucks. It sucks bad. But it doesn't automatically mean you are a bad person... just that you're not right for that person.
This is not about a scale of good to bad. This is about matching puzzle pieces. Just because two don't quite fit right doesn't make either puzzle piece "bad".